I been reading the news (i know it usually all bad) one thing stands out across this great nation of ours (the U.S.A) there are to many children getting hurt or killed because of neglect or just cause parents dont care or need help the warning signs are there but one must know what to look for a few weeks ago i made a statement that one person cant make a difference ok i admit it i was wrong as hell one person can and does make a difference you just need to push it on the right sources for them to take actions i made a difference in a lil boys life just being there and i will make a difference again either in his or another child again i underestimated my self with help from my therapist i can now see i did make a difference in a child, even though the adults are being stupid and childlike wow such a fool i been to wallow in self pity i will help another child or adult that needs it i believe children need more encouragement then adults and been looking back i helped alot of children in the past also a few regrettably hate me but so be it ,the good ones actually out weighs the bad ones or the ones that hate me lol i feel really good about my self ,it took a counselor to get me to recognize all the good i have done and alot more love to give but self emotions will always get in the way as it should be says my therapist (now he sounds a lil cracky lol) he says it will always hurt but thats why attachment is a good thing (ok more cracky) it makes you realize that you are human( dont have the heart to tell him im not human lmao ) and it always a lesson to be learned and makes you grow he says there are no right or wrong answers only what you learn from the previous lesson to bring to the next one (sounds like a mormon i asked him he not he Catholic makes sense though) i am discovering alot about my past when i was a kid things i haven't remembered in years really neat he said i was a latchkey kid i knew that it was the 70s most of us kids were then alot are now he says but he calls them digtal latchkey kids (always on computers or electronic devices) they dont do much but sit in front of screens compared to us 70s kids who seemed to be out n about doing things like getting into trouble (yup me) or hanging out at malls or parks .the terms the same, but i think he means today the digital latchkey kids are more lazy?? So us grownups should be more aware of situations that the child may not be ,i dunno i am kinda technological hooked but i could stop with help but this digital age may come to a crashing halt then todays youth would be so lost me i think it would bug me but i like books so i would have to buy ones made of paper then the thousands i have of ebooks i would be able to adapt but most wouldn't be able to there to dependent on technology most of todays kids wouldn't be able to handle it but they could adapt now then pass that knowledge down the road so if it did happen they be able to handle it i have alot i could hand down and try to i know i helped vaughn alot he has so many questions some that i was amazed he asked and some he just knew but wanted confirmation on what he knew or what i knew he very smart i do miss him i hope to see him again in the mean time i suppose just to move on and help another child i been afraid to up to now because i thought i failed with vaughn i been reassured that it not failure it just lessons that been fulfilled for now and someday may continue( hmm never thought that) if not it still not a failure just lessons learned for the next time of what or what not to do(a concept i never figured on) lessons are a part of life but sometimes the lessons suck thats for sure lol anyway got a few packages today there getting here fast got one of my laptop cooler it nice even fits in my laptop bag with my new laptop cant wait to get my xbox one s i got minecraft game a day after i ordered it and the xbox but dam it i got the game now where the consol lol it should be here next week or so cant wait been looking at games on amazon n gamestop going to stop at a few game places plus second hand stores they seem to have alot ps3 n 2 n xbox games i can play reg xbox and 360 games on this one s that be neat alot games seems cheaper then ps4 games n the ps5 is to come out either a week before Christmas or next Christmas i dont remember what there calling it but it is the next ps so much to say tonight oh i hope you saw the quotes n poems i posted the other night some really good mom doing good surgery went better then expected mom was still numb from waist down when we left the hospital i post updates tomorrow on her progress she felt really good and order a big dinner i dont know if she ate all but it was the most food i ever seen in front of her lol ok cute and adorable collections for a wedding Marsha Muggy doing good too ok more soon this is a big status loves to all hugs blessed be